I had been writing for years before I wrote the book. Personal journals. The Katie blog, which I’d been writing publicly for almost 25 years. But that was a carefully edited version of the story — the portion I could share without exposing too much. I was protecting everyone (the facade was alive and well), and I thought that was the same as being honest.

It wasn’t.

When I started sharing slices of the story, people kept saying, “You should write a book.” I nodded — but couldn’t figure out a way to tell the honest part. The untold chapters felt terrifyingly real.

We had lived through a lot. A LOT. But putting it into a book — that was a different animal. The story had lived in my head for years, arranged and rearranged in the private way you carry things you haven’t said yet. Putting it on paper felt like the moment before you say something out loud that you can’t take back.

What I needed, and didn’t have, was someone to help me think through what I was actually deciding.

Not whether the story was worth telling. I knew it was. Not whether I could write. I’d figure that out. But the questions underneath the questions — the ones about the people in the story. About what was mine to say. About how honest I could be without being reckless. About what I’d do if someone got angry. About whether I could live with the version of myself that existed on the page once it was out in the world.

Nobody talks about those questions. The things that honestly deserve serious, careful thought before you begin. They get collapsed into things like: Just start writing. Just be brave. How badly do you want this?

But that’s not what they are. They’re not tests of courage, and definitely aren’t resolved by just writing more. They’re questions of craft and conscience and relationship. They have real answers. And working through them before you begin is not the same as talking yourself out of writing. It’s how you write with intention instead of just with feeling.

Before You Write a Single Word is the workshop I’m running for women who are where I was six years ago. Carrying a story. Ready, mostly. Stuck on the questions, nobody has helped them answer.

90 minutes, live, limited to 20 women, so the conversation can be real. You’ll leave with a Decision Guide you can return to every time you’re weighing what to share.

The workshop is on Wednesday, May 20. Tickets are $69. Replay and Decision Guide included.

If this is you — or someone you know, click the link below to register.

This was originally posted on Substack.