Posts by Valerie Cantella
The Year I Needed A Navigator
Six months into asking how can this be easy, I found out where that question actually comes from In December, I wrote about the phrase I was taking into 2026: How can this be easy? I borrowed it from my business coach Krista Smith, and I loved it immediately. Not because I was looking for simplicity, but because…
Read MoreI Wrote An Entire Memoir But Needed An Editor To See That It Was Really Eight Different Stories
The proximity problem is real. You can’t see the architecture from inside the material. A story and a book are not the same thing. A story is what happened to you — the events, the sequence, the actual details. A book is different. A memoir is organized around a specific theme and an undeniable change:…
Read MoreThe Gap Between Dreaming of a Book and Actually Writing One
How a Candle Shop Illuminated Me Why I Do This Work You’re here because you have a lot of material and no table of contents. You know something is in there, but you just can’t see its shape from where you’re standing. So let me tell you about a birthday, my college roommate, and a…
Read MoreHaving A Story Is Not The Same Thing As Having a Book
My husband is wearing a continuous glucose monitor right now, not because he’s diabetic or even pre-diabetic, but because he’s working on improving his health. This data will give him information to make decisions. I’ve been watching him navigate it with the fascination of someone who has been doing this for forty-six years. He’s smart,…
Read MoreWhen Perfectionism Looks Like Analysis Paralysis: Is The Perfect Answer Really Hiding In the Numbers
I’m learning to have the courage to say I have enough information to move forward. It sounds simple. It’s not, at least not for me. I can geek out on analytics related to my business (an artifact of tracking diabetes-related data since I was 10). Weekly data reviews, tracking what resonates and what doesn’t, information…
Read MoreWhy Does Your Hardship Get to Matter?
The Voice Underneath “Before you write a memoir, there is often a question underneath the writing: Does my story matter enough to tell?” Steven Pressfield calls it “resistance” (The War of Art). That force that whispers you’re not ready, not talented enough, and definitely not the kind of person who writes books. That you should…
Read MoreWait… Who’s Kate?
Hello! If you’re thinking, “Dear Kate? Wait… who’s Kate?” — fair question. Don’t worry, you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be. There’s a fun little origin story behind the name, and I can’t wait to let you in on it. The Story Behind “Dear Kate” Kate was the wife of a former (and favorite!)…
Read MoreIs My Story Really Enough?
Don’t join the comparison Olympics team. There’s a belief most women carry when they think about writing their story. It has to be big. Dramatic. Resolved with a neat redemption arc that feels Hallmark complete. Then they think: Mine isn’t any of those things. So maybe I don’t have a story to tell. Or even…
Read MorePrepared in the wrong ways
Freshman year, 1985. San Marcos High School newspaper. That’s me in the polka dots, interviewing President Reagan’s press secretary, Larry Speakes. I was terrified. It was the nicest outfit I could pull together at the moment, and maybe it matched exactly how unprepared I felt. Fourteen years old, holding a tape recorder and a notebook,…
Read MorePermission to take your time
On the cost of moving fast before you’ve decided anything Isn’t it interesting how many appeals to potential writers rush you? It starts before you even open a document. “Just write a bad first draft.” “Don’t overthink it, just start.” “You’re thinking too much — you need to do.” Forward motion matters in most things…
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